4 Business Ideas That Changed the World: Emotional Intelligence; October 27, 2022

Harvard Business Review (HBR); 4 Business Ideas That Changed the World: Emotional Intelligence

"In the early 1990s, publishers told science journalist Daniel Goleman not to use the word “emotion” in a business book. The popular conception was that emotions had little role in the workplace. When HBR was founded in October 1922, the practice of management focused on workers’ physical productivity, not their feelings.

And while over the decades psychologists studied “social intelligence” and “emotional strength,” businesses cultivated the so-called hard skills that drove the bottom line. Until 1990, when psychologists Peter Salovey and John Mayer published their landmark journal article. It proposed “emotional intelligence” as the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions as well as those of others.

Daniel Goleman popularized the idea in his 1995 book, and companies came to hire for “EI” and teach it. It’s now widely seen as a key ingredient in engaged teams, empathetic leadership, and inclusive organizations. However, critics question whether emotional intelligence operates can be meaningfully measured and contend that it acts as a catchall term for personality traits and values.

4 Business Ideas That Changed the World is a special series from HBR IdeaCast. Each week, an HBR editor talks to world-class scholars and experts on the most influential ideas of HBR’s first 100 years, such as disruptive innovation, shareholder value, and scientific management.

Discussing emotional intelligence with HBR executive editor Alison Beard are:

• Daniel Goleman, psychologist and author of Emotional Intelligence
• Susan David, psychologist at Harvard Medical School and author of Emotional Agility
• Andy Parks, management professor at Central Washington University"

After a Historic Game, Patrick Mahomes Desperately Wanted to Speak With One Person. It's a Lesson in Emotional Intelligence; Inc., January 25, 2022

JUSTIN BARISO , Inc.; After a Historic Game, Patrick Mahomes Desperately Wanted to Speak With One Person. It's a Lesson in Emotional Intelligence

"Feeling Empathy vs. Showing Empathy

Psychologists Daniel Goleman and Paul Ekman have described three different

types of empathy:

• Cognitive: the ability to understand how another person thinks and feels
• Emotional: the ability to share the feelings of another person
• Compassionate: taking action, to help however one can

As you can see, compassionate empathy is the only one of the three that is active. Compassionate empathy moves a person to actually do something about what they've discovered. And while it may be the most challenging of the three to demonstrate, it's also the most rewarding.

But you might wonder, what would have motivated Mahomes to make such an effort to speak to a fierce competitor?

Rewind back to 2019, when Tom Brady and the Patriots defeated Mahomes and the Chiefs in a very similar fashion. After the game, Brady made a special effort to speak to Mahomes, to share an encouraging word and to help Mahomes keep his chin up.

"He said that he loved the way that I played," Mahomes once revealed in an interview with Tonight Show host Jimmy Fallon. "It was awesome for him to do that and to show that class at such an exciting moment."

This is why we say empathy begets empathy. 

When a person feels understood, they're more likely to try to reciprocate that effort. Or, as Mahomes demonstrates, to pay that empathy forward.

And the more you exercise your empathy muscle, the stronger it gets. For Mahomes, it will become only easier to show empathy the next time--to his wife, his family, his teammates, his coach, his friends, his competitors.

The result? You earn the respect of others, and are able to build stronger, deeper, more loyal relationships.

So, the next time you see someone suffering through something you've experienced, resist the urge to brush them aside. Instead, take a page out of Mahomes's playbook, and show some empathy.

It'll make you, and the people around you, that much better."

How Emotionally Intelligent People Use the 'Emergency Exit Rule' to Win Almost Every Argument; Inc., January 9, 2022

BILL MURPHY JR., Inc.; 

How Emotionally Intelligent People Use the 'Emergency Exit Rule' to Win Almost Every Argument

Give the other side an emotional victory, so you can achieve your ultimate goal.

"Here’s the key takeaway: People who have high emotional intelligence understand that if you want to be more persuasive and even win most arguments, it’s important to do two things:

• Avoid distracting, emotional mini-controversies.
• Offer easy ways for people to overcome emotional objections, and more easily follow the path you want them to take.

I call this the whole concept the "Emergency Exit Rule." It's about planting seeds that allow people to save face and maintain their pride-;while ultimately agreeing with you."

'Trump thought I was a secretary': Fiona Hill on the president, Putin and populism; The Guardian, June 12, 2020

Julian Borger, The Guardian; 

'Trump thought I was a secretary': Fiona Hill on the president, Putin and populism

[Kip Currier: Much to learn about emotional intelligence and organizational savvy from this Guardian interview with Fiona Hill, a former top expert on Russia for the Trump administration. Hill recounts, in an excerpt below, how showing respect for a secretarial staff person -- whom she did not know was a member of the selection committee for Harvard -- changed her life.]

"In place of a network, Hill had karma and a certain amount of luck. A chance meeting with a US academic on a work trip to Russia led to [sic] her to try for a place at Harvard. At the interview in London, only she and another northern girl, a farmer’s daughter from Sunderland, took the time to chat to the secretary. It turned out that the secretary was part of the selection panel, and it was the two northerners who won the fellowships."

Let Children Get Bored Again; The New York Times, February 2, 2019

Pamela Paul, The New York Times;

Let Children Get Bored Again

Boredom teaches us that life isn’t a parade of amusements. More important, it spawns creativity and self-sufficiency.

"Kids won’t listen to long lectures, goes the argument, so it’s on us to serve up learning in easier-to-swallow portions.

But surely teaching children to endure boredom rather than ratcheting up the entertainment will prepare them for a more realistic future, one that doesn’t raise false expectations of what work or life itself actually entails. One day, even in a job they otherwise love, our kids may have to spend an entire day answering Friday’s leftover email. They may have to check spreadsheets. Or assist robots at a vast internet-ready warehouse.

This sounds boring, you might conclude. It sounds like work, and it sounds like life. Perhaps we should get used to it again, and use it to our benefit. Perhaps in an incessant, up-the-ante world, we could do with a little less excitement."

6 Core Values and 5 Emotional Intelligence Skills Leading to Sound Ethical Decisions; IPWatchdog, July 6, 2017

Bernard Knight, IPWatchdog; 6 Core Values and 5 Emotional Intelligence Skills Leading to Sound Ethical Decisions

"Ethical conduct is required in all jobs and by all organizations.   It also applies to positions at all levels.   Anyone can disagree with a substantive business or legal decision, but make an ethical mistake and your company, firm or individual career could be in jeopardy.   I explain below some excellent tools to avoid ethical missteps...

This article discusses how you can use core values and emotional intelligence skills to avoid ethical mishaps.   These skills are easy to gain and can save you from an unintended ethical mishap.   For more on the importance of emotional intelligence, see my prior IPWatchdog article."

The future belongs to those with ‘soft skills’; Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, January 14, 2018

Gregg Behr, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette; The future belongs to those with ‘soft skills’

"As the world changes in rapid, unpredictable ways, tomorrow’s most successful learners will “need more than the ability to read, write and do arithmetic,” according to researchers writing in the journal The Future of Children. To thrive, they’ll also need to understand and manage their emotions, set and achieve goals, feel and show concern for others, establish positive relationships and make responsible decisions.

Now, many educators and parents are leading the charge to restore these skills — often called social-emotional or 21st-century skills — to their deserved role in a learner’s development...

A review of 82 social-emotional learning programs, conducted last year by a team of international researchers, found that students with soft-skills training scored 13 points higher academically than their peers — a boost that persisted well into adulthood. So, perhaps it’s no surprise that 90 percent of educators on the front lines think soft skills are both beneficial and teachable, according to The Aspen Institute’s National Commission on Social, Emotional, and Academic Development.

These benefits aren’t limited to academics, either. Writing in The Washington Post, author and educator Cathy N. Davidson recalled how Project Oxygen, a 2013 analysis of Google’s human-resources data, “shocked everyone” by concluding that, among the eight most important qualities of Google’s top employees, expertise in STEM fields — science, technology, engineering and math — “comes in dead last. The seven top characteristics of success at Google are all soft skills.” In fact, 80 percent of employers said they value such skills above all."

Hope Solo, tolerated and excused in victory, exposes herself in Olympic defeat; Washington Post, 8/12/16

Sally Jenkins, Washington Post; Hope Solo, tolerated and excused in victory, exposes herself in Olympic defeat:

"It’s called composure, and Hope Solo’s never been overburdened with a lot of that, or grace either. The U.S. women’s soccer team had their temperaments tested by a savvy, conservative Sweden in the Olympic quarterfinals and lost. Solo has spent years undermining their collective equilibrium, and this one’s on her.

She’s a chronically rattled and rattling soul, the American goalkeeper. Let’s face it: For every shiny marketing moment and big victory she’s been a part of, she’s given the U.S. a nasty unwanted drama. The victories usually smoothed over her behavior. Not this time. This time she went pure loser and lout.

After giving up the winning penalty kick to Sweden, Solo called her opponents “a bunch of cowards” for their conservative game plan. Now, who is the real coward here? Solo gave up three regulation goals in the past two games, between a draw with Colombia and this loss. She tried to ice Lisa Dahlkvist on the final kick by changing her gloves, and then couldn’t lay a hand on the ball. And she couldn’t take responsibility for any of it; she could only lash out."

Presidents need to be able to do nothing. Donald Trump can’t do it.; Washington Post, 7/15/16

J. Peter Scoblic, Washington Post; Presidents need to be able to do nothing. Donald Trump can’t do it. :

"In crises, there is enormous pressure to act — a “plunge toward action,” as historians Richard Neustadt and Ernest May have written. Yet smart leadership demands self-control. Presidential history is replete with examples of judicious inaction...

The presidency may be a bully pulpit, but that makes it all the more imperative that its occupant knows how to keep his mouth shut and his powder dry. Trump rarely has shown such discipline — in his campaign statements or his business ventures.

During his presidential run, he has lurched from one angry outburst to the next, attacking anyone who dares criticize him, childishly belittling his opponents and excommunicating news organizations (including The Washington Post) that don’t sufficiently flatter him. He is so reflexively combative that, according to Fox News’s Howard Kurtz, his staff has stopped presenting him with interview requests to reduce the “risk of the candidate making mistakes or fanning minor controversies.”"

The bottom line on emotional intelligence; San Diego Union-Tribune, 12/27/15

Jennifer Davies, San Diego Union-Tribune; The bottom line on emotional intelligence:

"You may be smart, but that may not be enough in today’s job market. More companies are looking for those who are emotionally savvy as well.

Trevor Blair, director of executive search for Manpower San Diego, a local employment agency, said the importance of a high EQ, also known as emotional intelligence, cannot be understated, especially for “knowledge workers, millennials and members of the creative class, who simply don’t respond to old-school methods of motivation in the workplace.”

But what exactly is emotional intelligence?

Travis Bradberry, the author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0, has described it this way: “Emotional intelligence is the ‘something’ in each of us that is a bit intangible. It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities and make personal decisions that achieve positive results.”"

The 5 things people with high emotional intelligence are likely to do; Independent, 1/7/16

Mollie Goodfellow, , Independent; The 5 things people with high emotional intelligence are likely to do:

"If you have high emotional intelligence, it suggest that you are good at recognising your emotions and the emotions of those around you.

You use this intelligence to influence your behaviour - if someone around you is upset, you’ll be comforting, or if someone is angry you’ll try and be a calming influence.

There are however some characteristics and actions that those with high emotional intelligence won’t do, which may differ from those who have an average level of EQ.

In a thread on Quora, some users discussed the various behaviours of those with high emotional understanding, and which were less common for those without."

Rather than a last stand, the Bengals stupidly went for a last punch; Guardian, 1/10/16

Les Carpenter, Guardian; Rather than a last stand, the Bengals stupidly went for a last punch:

"The best NFL teams aren’t necessarily those with the most talent.

The best NFL teams are those that don’t do what the Bengals did against the Steelers.

The best teams resist the urge to throw the last punch."

How Emotional Intelligence Became a Key Leadership Skill; Harvard Business Review, 4/28/15

Andrew Ovans, Harvard Business Review; How Emotional Intelligence Became a Key Leadership Skill:

"Anyone trying to come up to speed on emotional intelligence would have a pretty easy time of it since the concept is remarkably recent, and its application to business newer still. The term was coined in 1990 in a research paper by two psychology professors, John D. Mayer of UNH and Peter Salovey of Yale. Some years later, Mayer defined it in HBR this way:

From a scientific (rather than a popular) standpoint, emotional intelligence is the ability to accurately perceive your own and others’ emotions; to understand the signals that emotions send about relationships; and to manage your own and others’ emotions. It doesn’t necessarily include the qualities (like optimism, initiative, and self-confidence) that some popular definitions ascribe to it.

It took almost a decade after the term was coined for Rutgers psychologist Daniel Goleman to establish the importance of emotional intelligence to business leadership. In 1998, in what has become one of HBR’s most enduring articles, “What Makes a Leader,” he states unequivocally:

The most effective leaders are all alike in one crucial way: they all have a high degree of what has come to be known as emotional intelligence. It’s not that IQ and technical skills are irrelevant. They do matter, but…they are the entry-level requirements for executive positions. My research, along with other recent studies, clearly shows that emotional intelligence is the sine qua non of leadership. Without it, a person can have the best training in the world, an incisive, analytical mind, and an endless supply of smart ideas, but he still won’t make a great leader."

Starving for Wisdom; New York Times, 4/16/15

Nicholas Kristof, New York Times; Starving for Wisdom:

"“We are drowning in information, while starving for wisdom.”

That epigram from E.O. Wilson captures the dilemma of our era. Yet the solution of some folks is to disdain wisdom...

So, to answer the skeptics, here are my three reasons the humanities enrich our souls and sometimes even our pocketbooks as well...

First, liberal arts equip students with communications and interpersonal skills that are valuable and genuinely rewarded in the labor force, especially when accompanied by technical abilities.

“A broad liberal arts education is a key pathway to success in the 21st-century economy,” says Lawrence Katz, a labor economist at Harvard. Katz says that the economic return to pure technical skills has flattened, and the highest return now goes to those who combine soft skills — excellence at communicating and working with people — with technical skills...

Third, wherever our careers lie, much of our happiness depends upon our interactions with those around us, and there’s some evidence that literature nurtures a richer emotional intelligence."

How to Be Emotionally Intelligent; New York Times, 4/7/15

Daniel Goleman, New York Times; How to Be Emotionally Intelligent:

"What makes a great leader? Knowledge, smarts and vision, to be sure. To that, Daniel Goleman, author of “Leadership: The Power of Emotional Intelligence,” would add the ability to identify and monitor emotions — your own and others’ — and to manage relationships. Qualities associated with such “emotional intelligence” distinguish the best leaders in the corporate world, according to Mr. Goleman, a former New York Times science reporter, a psychologist and co-director of a consortium at Rutgers University to foster research on the role emotional intelligence plays in excellence. He shares his short list of the competencies."

Leadership Is About to Get More Uncomfortable; Harvard Business Review, 7/1/14

Georg Vielmetter and Yvonne Sell, Harvard Business Review; Leadership Is About to Get More Uncomfortable:

"Among our findings is that leadership in the future will involve increased personal and business-level discomfort. Leaders will have to cope with the blurring of private and public life – and they will have to forge new relationships with competitors and employees. This requires new skills and mindsets. Ego is on its way out...

Leaders motivated by power over others will not thrive in this new world.We will see more “altrocentric” leaders, who understand that leadership is a relationship and will therefore primarily focus on others rather than themselves. Adept at engaging rather than commanding, they see themselves as just one integral part of the whole. Altrocentric leaders will be capable of long-term vision encompassing both global and local perspectives.

David McClelland points out that both emotionally intelligent leaders and their egocentric counterparts tend to be motivated by power; they enjoy having an impact on others.The difference is in the type of power driving them: Egocentric leaders tend to be concerned only with personalized power – power that gets them ahead. Altrocentric leaders, on the other hand, derive power from motivating, not controlling, others.

The altrocentric leader who is intrinsically motivated by socialized power, and who draws strength and satisfaction from teaching, teambuilding, and empowering others, will be able to handle the increased pressure of tomorrow’s business environment."

Manage a Difficult Conversation with Emotional Intelligence; Harvard Business Review, 6/19/14

Susan David, Harvard Business Review; Manage a Difficult Conversation with Emotional Intelligence:

"Emotions cannot be ignored. In fact, research suggests that suppressing your emotions – deciding not to say something when you’re upset – can lead to bad results. Have you ever yelled at your spouse or child after a frustrating day at work – a frustration that had nothing to do with him or her? That’s what psychologists refer to as “emotional leakage.” When you bottle up your feelings, you’re likely to express your emotions in unintended ways instead, either sarcastically or in a completely different context. Suppressing your emotions is associated with poor memory, difficulties in relationships, and physiological costs (like cardiovascular health problems). Emotions matter.

When Karl came to me with questions about his upcoming meeting, I walked him through a plan based on the principles of emotional intelligence. This plan would help him acknowledge logic and emotion during the meeting...

Emotionally intelligent leaders are aware of what causes their emotions, and they also think through what outcomes are most desirable...

Emotions aren’t just the result of a workplace conflict. In fact, emotions usually are the conflict. They need to be acknowledged and planned for. Recognizing emotions, assessing their impact on thinking, understanding them, and managing them is a roadmap for navigating through those often-murky (and anxiety-provoking) waters."

7 Things You Should Expect From Your Leaders In 2014; Forbes, 12/27/13

Glenn Llopis, Forbes; 7 Things You Should Expect From Your Leaders In 2014: "Employees expect a lot from their leaders and when they don’t get what they expect they begin to lose trust and respect for their leader. As the workplace continues to transition from a knowledge to a wisdom-based environment, the requirements for great leadership are changing. For example, leaders must have greater emotional intelligence so they can connect more intuitively with their employees. They must become better listeners, opportunity enablers and exceptional coaches. Because employees are in search for high-trust relationships, leaders must be more instinctually connected with their employees and this requires them to be more self-aware about how their overall behavior and the example they set impacts the performance of others. It’s easy for leaders to get lost in the spotlight of their leadership roles and lose sight of the increased performance demands and political pressures that go with the responsibility. Leadership is all about people and if leaders begin to lose touch with those they lead – they will become disconnected with the requirements of the business and the marketplace in which they compete. In the process, they begin to lose their leadership momentum and weaken their personal brand identity... Great leadership requires an understanding of oneself before you can effectively comprehend, appreciate and leverage the unique skill-sets and competencies of others. Unfortunately, many people throughout their careers don’t have enough leaders who can best identify and enable their full potential. This is why so many employees feel stuck and experience regret in their careers. They find themselves feeling trapped at work with leaders that only care about themselves – or who have never taken the time to get to know them well enough to guide their career growth and potential. Leadership is a serious responsibility and if you don’t have the executive presence and other intangibles to manage the spotlight, or the time to understand the people that you serve and the ability to balance and prioritize multiple agendas, your tenure will be short-lived. As you head into the new year, you should have great expectations for your workplace leaders and play a more active role in holding them accountable to step-up their game."

The Focused Leader; Harvard Business Review Magazine, December 2013

Daniel Goleman, Harvard Business Review Magazine; The Focused Leader: "A primary task of leadership is to direct attention.To do so, leaders must learn to focus their own attention. When we speak about being focused, we commonly mean thinking about one thing while filtering out distractions. But a wealth of recent research in neuroscience shows that we focus in many ways, for different purposes, drawing on different neural pathways—some of which work in concert, while others tend to stand in opposition. Grouping these modes of attention into three broad buckets—focusing on yourself, focusing on others, and focusing on the wider world—sheds new light on the practice of many essential leadership skills. Focusing inward and focusing constructively on others helps leaders cultivate the primary elements of emotional intelligence. A fuller understanding of how they focus on the wider world can improve their ability to devise strategy, innovate, and manage organizations. Every leader needs to cultivate this triad of awareness, in abundance and in the proper balance, because a failure to focus inward leaves you rudderless, a failure to focus on others renders you clueless, and a failure to focus outward may leave you blindsided."

Lincoln’s School of Management; New York Times, 1/26/13

Nancy F. Koehn, New York Times; Lincoln’s School of Management: "In this season of all things Lincoln — when Steven Spielberg is probably counting his Oscars already — executives, entrepreneurs and other business types might consider dusting off their history books and taking a close look at what might be called the Lincoln school of management. Even before “Lincoln” the movie came along, there was a certain cult of leadership surrounding the 16th president. C.E.O.'s and lesser business lights have long sought inspiration from his life and work. But today, as President Obama embarks on a new term and business leaders struggle to keep pace with a rapidly changing global economy, the lessons of Lincoln seem as fresh as ever. They demonstrate the importance of resilience, forbearance, emotional intelligence, thoughtful listening and the consideration of all sides of an argument. They also show the value of staying true to a larger mission. “Lincoln’s presidency is a big, well-lit classroom for business leaders seeking to build successful, enduring organizations,” Howard Schultz, chief executive of Starbucks, said in an e-mail."