Friends at Work? Not So Much; New York Times, 9/4/15

Adam Grant, New York Times; Friends at Work? Not So Much:

"In a study led by the social psychologist Jeffrey Sanchez-Burks, Anglo-American, Mexican and Mexican-American participants watched a four-minute video of two people working together. Shortly after, the Americans generally remembered just as much as the Mexicans and Mexican-Americans about the task, but much less about the social interaction. Anglo-Americans struggled to remember the socioemotional aspects, such as smiling, handshaking and discussions about movies and weekend plans. In other studies, Americans were less likely to notice subtleties in communication when a message was described as having been sent from a manager at a large company than when the same message was supposedly sent from a friend. There was no such discrepancy between the professional and personal among people from China or South Korea.

Why are Americans so determined to get down to business?

The economic explanation is that long-term employment has essentially vanished: Instead of spending our careers at one organization, we expect to jump ship every few years. Since we don’t plan to stick around, we don’t invest in the same way. We view co-workers as transitory ties, greeting them with arms-length civility while reserving real camaraderie for outside work...

Whether we bond at work is a personal decision, but it may involve less effort and vulnerability than we realize. Jane E. Dutton, a professor at the University of Michigan, finds that a high-quality connection doesn’t require “a deep or intimate relationship.” A single interaction marked by respect, trust and mutual engagement is enough to generate energy for both parties. However small they appear, those moments of connection can transform a transaction into a relationship."